Below are some of the more questionable, comical or just plain dumb laws that exist in each of the fifty states.
Alabama
You can’t wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
Don’t even think about it, kid.
Alaska
If you see a sleeping bear, it’s illegal to wake it up for a photo op.
Also known as “suicide.”
Arizona
Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
Arkansas
You’re not allowed to pronounce “Arkansas” incorrectly.
Not to be confused with “KANzis”.
California
It’s unlawful to allow a dog to pursue a bear or a bobcat at any time.
But in Homeward Bound, the dogs just run away from them.
Colorado
Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.
Which means everyone is a criminal outside of Colorado.
Connecticut
A pickle is not a pickle until it bounces.
Yes. We made a GIF for this.
Delaware
You are forbidden to sell the hair of a dog.
The real reason the Newton family had so many St. Bernards.
Florida
They accidentally banned every computer in the state by poorly wording a law which outlawed Internet Cafés.
If you’re in Florida reading this, please turn yourself into the local police.
Georgia
You can’t keep an ice cream cone in your back pocket on Sundays.
Forrest totally has an ice cream cone here.
Hawaii
You cannot use imitation milk in a milkshake without warning the drinker.
But Spam can go in anything, anywhere, all the time.
Idaho
Giving your sweetheart a box of chocolates weighing more that 50 pounds is illegal.
But unlimited McDonald’s is totally cool.
Illinois
You can drink under 21, if you’re enrolled in a culinary program.
“I got my culinary license so I could test out the rich flavors of Franzia and Yellowtail…”
Indiana
The value of Pi is 3.
Maybe Hoosiers should stick to basketball.
Iowa
One-armed piano players must perform for free.
Same goes for people (or, um, space critters) without noses.
Kansas
If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
You CAN pass, just wait a moment.
Kentucky
A person can’t dye ducklings, baby chicks, or bunnies.
Let’s just call this, “The drunk uncle at Easter law”
Louisiana
It’s a $500 fine for sending a pizza man to a friend’s house without them knowing.
Pizza is not a joke.
Maine
It is illegal for Christmas decorations to still be up after January 14th.
Honestly, this should be a national law.
Maryland
A vending machine may NOT dispense a non-latex condom.
It’s how you use it.
Massachussetts
You cannot own an explosive golf ball.
But they only explode if you hit them.
Michigan
A woman isn’t allowed to cut her own hair without her husband’s permission.
DO YOU WANT TO GO TO JAIL?
Minnesota
Using goldfish as bait is against the law.
Body parts are still up for debate.
Mississippi
High school teachers may not have sex with their students.
It is illegal, but mostly: gross.
Missouri
One cannot drive with an uncaged bear.
One is also insane if they’re driving with a bear, caged or uncaged.
Montana
Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party… and you can shoot them.
This law has another word – “racism.”
Nebraska
Whale fishing is illegal.
Shark fishing is totally cool, though.
Nevada
A man can’t buy drinks for more than three people at a time.
Putting roofies in them is frowned upon, also.
New Hampshire
It’s illegal to show a movie before 2 pm.
Seeing Frozen alone at 1 p.m. is no longer an option.
New Jersey
If you’ve been arrested for drunk driving, you lose the privilege of personalized plates.
And that kids, is how bumpers stickers were invented.
New Mexico
Idiots may not vote. Nor can insane people.
